Executive TLDR

Anthony Barone explains that success in building distribution and serving clients depends on developing an attractive personality. He outlines traits such as positivity, enthusiasm, decisiveness, sincerity, courtesy, emotional control, humility, faith, and personal magnetism. His message centers on leading energy, keeping your word, mastering communication, and becoming someone others naturally want to follow in business and life.

Video Summary

Anthony Barone delivers a fast-paced and energetic message about the principles that make someone attractive in business. He explains that whether you are building distribution or working with clients at Primerica, people are drawn to personalities that project strength, clarity, and positivity.

He begins with the foundation: a positive mental attitude. Negativity repels people, while enthusiasm and flexibility attract them. Business rarely goes exactly as planned, so adaptability becomes essential. He emphasizes having a clear mission statement because people follow leaders who know where they are going. A sense of purpose signals stability and direction, which builds trust.

Decisiveness is another major trait. Indecision frustrates clients and teammates. Strong leaders guide people toward decisions rather than creating confusion. Barone explains that being direct, clear, and confident makes others feel secure. He reinforces the importance of courtesy, smiling, posture, tonality, and effective speech. These subtle communication habits shape first impressions and long-term influence.

He highlights integrity and consistency. Keeping your word, showing up early, leaving late, and following through on commitments builds credibility. Tact, tolerance, and open-mindedness prevent unnecessary conflict, especially in a world where personal opinions often create division. Leaders must focus on being interested in others rather than trying to be interesting themselves. Listening carefully, maintaining eye contact, and remembering details show genuine care.

Emotional control is critical. Losing control of emotions often leads to saying things that damage relationships. Intentional honesty and transparency build trust with clients and teammates. Versatility allows leaders to connect with different personality types, while humility keeps ego from blocking growth. Barone reminds the audience that sharing success is not bragging but demonstrating what is possible.

He also stresses faith—faith in yourself, your team, and the company. Personal magnetism comes from energy. Leaders must act as thermostats, setting the emotional climate of the room rather than reacting like thermometers. When you walk into a space, your presence should elevate energy, confidence, and belief.

His overall message is clear: attractive personalities are not accidental. They are developed through discipline, self-awareness, communication skills, and emotional maturity. When leaders embody these traits, they naturally attract recruits, clients, and long-term success.

FAQs

What is an attractive personality in business?
It is a combination of positivity, decisiveness, enthusiasm, integrity, humility, and strong communication skills that draw people toward you.

Why is decisiveness important in leadership?
Clear decisions create confidence and prevent confusion for clients and teammates.

What does being a thermostat mean?
It means setting the emotional tone of the environment rather than reacting to it.

Why is listening emphasized?
People feel valued when they are heard, which builds trust and influence.

Can these traits be developed?
Yes. Attractive leadership qualities are built through intentional practice, discipline, and self-awareness.

Glossary

Primerica
A financial services company focused on helping middle-income families with insurance and investment solutions.

Distribution
The growth of a sales organization through recruiting and developing representatives.

Positive Mental Attitude (PMA)
A mindset focused on optimism, opportunity, and solution-oriented thinking.

Personal Magnetism
The ability to attract others through confidence, energy, and authenticity.

Thermostat Leadership
The concept of setting and controlling the emotional climate of a group rather than reacting to it.

Transcript:

Thank you.

All right.

Good afternoon. Hey, can you guys get my PowerPoint up? All right, so I don’t do PowerPoints. I’m sorry. So you guys just got to keep up. I’m going to go through 75 points in ten minutes, okay? And so I lied to Joe, and I said it’s 17 rules. It was, like, 57 after I counted them. But anyway, so listen, whether you’re building distribution, which should be your goal here, or you’re dealing with clients, you have to make sure that you have what we call an attractive personality, okay? Because not all of you are going to have all this, so you’re going to have to work with the other stuff. You know what I’m saying? So one of the first thing is, if you want to attract people, you have to have a positive mental attitude. No one wants to talk or no one wants to talk to or be around somebody.

That’s negative, right? So you got to be positive. That’ll attract people to you. You got to be enthusiastic. You have to have flexibility. You got to be flexible, and you have to adapt. Not every situation goes the way you want it to go. True or false, right? So you got to be able to adapt to that. You have to have a sincerity of purpose. How many of you have a mission statement? Every one of you should have a mission statement. If you don’t have a mission statement, you’re not going to be driven to go through the crap you need to go through. But more importantly, you’re going to look rudderless to people you’re trying to attract. If people know you’re the type of person that is focused on something, you have a mission, people will want to follow you. That’s attractive. Does that make sense?

Right?

So promptness of decision. That’s another thing, right? How frustrating is it when people can’t make a decision? Does that agitate anybody? Right? Hey, I’m not really sure how many of you are married in here and have that what do you want to do for dinner? Conversation, right? Which is a friggin trap for any man that is in this room. What do you want for dinner, honey? How about sushi? No, something else. What the frick did you ask me for? What about Italian? We’re Italian. We make that at home. Okay? And it’s like, what do you want? And then she tells you, and everybody’s happy, right? If you’re in business like that, well, what do you want to do?

Right?

People, when you’re across the table with a client, some of you all, if you’re not given multiple, you got to be, hey, is it A? Is it B, or is it C? Which one’s better for you? Not, hey, we have this, we have that. What do you want to do? It’s not going to work for you, right? So before I get any further, I want to tell you a quick story. First, of all, there’s a lot of places people could be today, true or false, and congratulations to you for being here. But you know what I want to recognize? We got a 17 year old here. Matt, wave up. Wave your hand for a minute. That’s matt D’Angelo. Give him a hand. Do you know how do you understand how wealthy he’s going to be by 25 years old? Because he’s not even able to legitimately join yet for another two months.

And I think about that. And I started this process recruiting you, Matt, in 1994, when I hired a woman that sent me to her cousin. They both clients, enjoyed that. Sent me to someone that parked cars at a country club who introduced me to a very wealthy man in the country club that owned a car dealership who introduced me to a girl in the car dealership that joined the company, who introduced me to your aunt, who introduced me to her sister in law, which introduced me to your dad. He wasn’t even born yet. Your dad wasn’t even married when he was a client of mine. He was 20 something years old. Isn’t that amazing? When you think about the lineage of what could happen from one conversation? One conversation. So it’s just something that you start thinking about that. And I love the energy of people that are focused on being successful, right?

So, listen, effective speech is important. That’s another thing. It said ten minutes. Now it says three. What the hell? All right, I’m done. No having courtesy. You know what bothers me? Rude people, right? You got to be courteous to people. No one’s going to be attracted to a rude person, right? And that doesn’t mean that you can’t tell people the way it is. Ryan or Allison said, you’re going to talk about positive characteristics and being an attractive person. I’m like, yeah, damn straight I am, right? So listen, smiling’s a key, right? Smiling is attractive to people, right? Nobody ever if someone came up to you like, hey, you want to join my business? You’d be like, what the frig, right? Posture, the way you speak tonality. Right? That stuff’s important, right? You got to make sure that you’re using the right mannerisms at the right time, right?

So, I mean, these are all important things. Know what you’re going to say and freaking say it, right? And mean what you say and say what you mean. You want to be attractive to people, keep the damn word. Show up first, leave last. If you say you’re going to be somewhere, right? If you buy a ticket, freaking use it on a Super Saturday. Just saying tactfulness. I’m very tactful. Saying the right things at the right time. I am just awesome at that. Tolerance. Appeal to be open minded, appeal to all too many of you all have your own opinion, and you think it’s actually important. That’s why you get your asses in trouble on social media, right? Your opinion is not that important. You know whose opinion is important? The person I’m talking to. That’s whose opinion is important, right? So be interested. Not interesting, right?

What does that person have to say? Listen, this helps me from keeping divorced, right? Listen, honestly, if you marry, how many of you have ever changed the subject on your spouse or looked away from your spouse when you’re talking? It doesn’t usually end up well, right, Joe? So Denise calls me up all the time, says, Joe’s a real ass. He doesn’t look at me when he talks. No, I mean so listen, be interested. Now, these are two ears, one mouth for a reason. Focus on the person you’re talking to. Eyeball to eyeball. People are amazed that I can remember what their kitchen looks like from 25 years ago. I don’t know. It’s a sick thing. I can’t remember what I’m supposed to do on the way home right now, but I can remember what someone’s house looked like in 1993. I don’t know. Emotional control.

That’s important, right? Joe used to say, if you lose control of your emotions, you lose control of your mouth, and you’re going to say some stupid ass crap. True or false? You’re going to say something like, balls in the front of the room, right? So I didn’t get any of that speech, and he said, balls, and I was like, I’m in. What happened? I get it now.

All right?

So sense of justice. Know what’s right?

Right?

Intentional honesty. Be transparent, right? You’re dealing with a client. Tell them what’s going to happen. You’re dealing with a new teammate. Tell them what’s going to happen. I don’t believe in this crap. This is what’s going to happen. This is what you need to do. You need to show up here. We’re going to do this. You need to show up here. We’re going to do that. That’s why you’re going to make money, right? Verse versatility, right? You got to be versatile. You got to appeal to many. You got to have humility. I don’t know about you, and this is hard in Primerica, because people want to communicate to you the quality of life they achieve by doing this. And sometimes, if you’re not in the right headspace, you might think, why is that guy bragging about this? Or Why is that guy bragging? It’s not bragging.

We’re trying to help you understand what’s available to you. And listen, I don’t do like a lot of you to me. My wealth is my time. I do what I want when I frigging want, period.

Right?

So, I mean, it’s not what I drive and where I live and all, and we get to do some stuff, but it’s just I just do what I want when I want. If you ask my son today, if you could have made a million dollars a year and had anything you want or would you rather what we’re doing right now? I’m home all the time, I know my son. We’re like this. I know people that are wealthy and successful. They don’t even know their friggin kids, right? Humility. Showmanship. Got to have some showmanship, right? Faith. Faith is attractive. And I’m not talking about, I was going to get up here and quote some scripture today, but I’m not going to do that. But it’s faith in yourself, faith in the company, faith in your teammates, right? And they got to have faith in you that they know that you’re doing what you’re supposed to do, right?

The ability to shake hands and greet people, right? One of the things that I can’t stand when people don’t greet people properly, my son, when he went to his first school, the principal, he was like this high, right? And the principal used to ask him to welcome all the students because without prompting him, he would go up to everybody. I taught him, look him in the eye and go, hi, my name’s Anthony Barone, and shake their hand. Till today, at 25 years old, he still does that with everyone he meets. Sometimes I forget to do it. When I meet somebody and I’m with him and he does it, I’m like, oh, I look like a schmuck. You got to have personal magnetism. And the key to that is what type of energy are you transmitting? Are people attracted to it? When you walk in a room, do they go, he’s here, coach is here?

It’s a big difference, right? Make sure you’re thermostat you’re thermometer, not thermostat make sure you’re controlling the energy, right?